COVID-19 Vaccine Conspiracy Theories:
1. The vaccine will turn us into vampires and the sun will kill us like it kills the coronavirus. There are no bats to be found in China. Curious, isn’t it?
2. If they test our blood before giving a vaccine, and we’re natural-born coronavirus killers, they will suck us dry and use us as the new vaccine.
3. We have already been vaccinated. Black Ford Explorers with suits inside keep showing up at water distribution plants.
4. Face masks are impregnated with dried-out vaccine. Impregnated means a girlfriend might get pregnant from wearing a mask.
5. Toilet paper is part of the government’s master plan. TP is laced with skin absorbable vaccine and we’re getting it from those bounties of paper products, absorbed right up our…uh…hands.
6. The Asian giant hornet was developed at the Wuhan Chinese lab and carries Coronavirus in its stinger.
7. Alternatively, the same hornet carries a new vaccine in exchange for not imposing economic sanctions against China.
8. The vaccine will turn us into cows which is why the scientists keep saying “herd immunity.”
9. After the vaccination stage, the government will move into the next stage where we’ll deliberately be exposed to the virus using the techniques listed above.
10. These theories were put together by the government to make us paranoid and drive us to either leave the country or volunteer for vaccine testing.
